Tech News Haikus

Tech News Haikus

Regarding Google's Alexa-powered CoWatch, a smartwatch for Android Wear...

More than just the time:

Personal secretary,

Now upon your wrist.


Regarding Groups, Snapchat's new functionality to share with up to 16 people...

Finally! The day

My friend circle can discuss

That snap of my lunch!


Regarding Tinder's new app for Apple TV...

Up on the big screen:

Dating! A party affair?

Friends help choose your swipes.


Regarding OpenAI's Universe, measuring and training AI agents' intelligence through games...

Digital playground;

Programs learning, playing games.

Robophobia….


Regarding Facebook's announcement of Workplace, their collaboration app to compete with Slack, Microsoft Teams...

My boss just asked me:

“Social media at work?”

"Collaborating."


Regarding the increase of iCloud calendar spam leading up to Black Friday...

STOP; UNSUBSCRIBE ME,

I reply, inundated;

Away, fake Ray-Bans!


Regarding announcements from Sling TV and AT&T's DirecTV Now to introduce cloud DVRs...

Stream, record, stream; but

I wait for a glory day:

NO MORE COMMERCIALS.


Regarding the U.S. Navy data breach that compromised over 130,000 sailors' personal information...

Digital sea storm:

Even those who serve aren’t safe

From thieves behind screens!


Regarding NBCUniversal's $200M investment in BuzzFeed, just in time to reassure me that I'll have creative suggestions for my Thanksgiving leftovers...

I am so thankful

For articles, recipes;

Brainless consuming.


Regarding Google and Intel strengthening their partnership...

Strategic allies,

Growing cloud infrastructure;

Giants, shaking hands.


Regarding Oracle acquiring Dyn...

Stronger in the cloud!

Can Oracle win the web

As a "one-stop" shop?


Regarding BMW's ride share expansion and pilot...

Get from A to B

While looking fly and fancy;

Pimp my taxi ride.


Regarding Twitter's new muting and reporting tools...

Down with abusers!

Forget the Facebook scandal;

We can silence trolls!


Regarding Microsoft launching  the new collaboration tool, Teams...

Another platform

For communications, lost

In a sea of memes.


Regarding China's strict new cyber security law, in effect November 7...

New legislation:

Make more secure or controlled?

[Last line was censored]


Regarding Google displaying the US election outcomes in search results...

Sigh, America…

Google and you shall receive;

Half sure to grumble.


Regarding Microsoft's Project Olympus server hardware designs shared at an early development stage...

"Open-source" hardware;

Sharing is caring, and this?

Unprecedented.


Regarding the new, improved Outlook mobile app that displays availability…

They hunt me, always;

No escape! Quickly I must

Set more "busy" hours.


Regarding CenturyLink's pending acquisition of Level 3 for $34 billion…

Telecom giant:

Robust, high-fiber network.

Not unlike my gut.


Haikus regarding Friday's massive DDoS attacks on Dyn...

Hark! Cyber chaos!

Precious Internet, attacked;

Killed my streaming jams.


Regarding Microsoft's shares at an all-time high...

Microsoft stocks soar

Thanks to cloud, Office, Surface;

Can’t wait for LinkedIn.

 

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